Monday, October 6, 2008

An empty soul

Monday, February 25, 2008
10:14:50 PM CST
Feeling Hopeful
Hearing State of Independence - Donna Summer

An empty soul


Today I will change my life. I will transform myself into a beautiful swan and gain the attention of all those eligible bachelors that have failed to look my way. I will become one of those gorgeous women the paparazzi love to follow around. This task should not be too difficult to accomplish. My determination and recent tax return will enable me to accomplish my task.

First, I'll go to Regis and have my hair done in the latest style. It matters not if it looks well on me or not; just the simple fact that I will fit in with the beautiful people will do. I will go to the nail salon and have them put french tips on my fingers and as long as I'm there, I'll have them give me a pedicure too. I'll stop at a tattoo shop and get my belly button pierced. I'll shop at Old Navy and buy the latest fashion trend. I'll make sure to buy my pants a size too small so they hang below my belly and show all the gifts God gave me. Then I'll put my make-up on. Anything I don't want you to see will be artistically hidden beneath rouge, powders and mascara compliments of Clinique.

After I've made myself up, I'll go to the latest night club and catch me a man. It matters not if he has half a brain or not, just as long as he's good looking and muscular. He must have a good job and drive the latest sports car, because without these he won't be able to cater to my beautiful looks and newly acquired ego. He must buy me furs and jewelry and take me to expensive restaurants. He must buy me flowers and have them delivered to my office at least once a week so that all the other girls can seethe in envy over my catch. It doesn't matter if he loves me or not; he's simply a piece of jewelry I can wear around town.

Now that I have narrowed my view, I will no longer have to worry about the world around me. I'll have no time to worry about the homeless, the greenhouse effect or the upcoming presidential election. There will be no time for children, pets or family. They will do nothing but divert my attention to what is most important. Education will become a worthless endeavor, for I intend on making my mark on this world with my looks alone. I will become the person that everyone wants to be. It won't matter if I'm happy or content. What's far more important is how everyone sees me.

When the day is over I'll go home alone. I'll eat my dinner, watch the news, and crawl into my bed alone. I should sleep well because I have no distractions. There will be be no worries that deprive me of sleep, no children to tuck into bed or kiss good night, and no pets to be let out in the night. There will be no one beside me to keep me awake at night with their loud snoring, tossing and turning. I will not have to share a thing. Not the covers or pillows, nor the fears of the loud noise outside. All of these will be mine. Isn't it amazing what money can buy?

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